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How To Genuinely Compliment Someone Without Mentioning Appearance.
COMPLIMENTS ARE THE BEST.
No.
Wait.
GENUINE COMPLIMENTS ARE THE BEST!
I like to uplift people, draw out positivity and give compliments readily, and most importantly, genuinely. Because the feeling it gives someone is awesome and in this day and age, there are people ready and waiting to put us down at any chance they get. Don’t be that person, we already have enough of them!
Who doesn’t want to be known as someone who sees the good in people in a world where negativity spreads like wildfire? Who spreads love and positivity? It really is amazing what you can do for another person, acknowledging a strength/quality/aura… So many things we tend to take for granted in a person.
SO WHY SHOULDN’T WE COMPLIMENT PEOPLE BASED ON APPEARANCE? PEOPLE ARE PRETTY!?
Ok. Yes, people are pretty, but when we only ever give appearance-focused compliments, it encourages the notion that physical attributes are held at a higher value than anything else a person has about them.
If these are the only characteristics that a person gets complimented on positively, it becomes problematic in the sense that they don’t see more value in themselves beyond their ‘nice hair’ ‘weight loss’ or ‘pretty smile’.
Not cool, right?
I love getting compliments, and it makes me feel great that so many people notice many nice things about myself, but, I notice it a lot on social media the most common comments of appraisal are to do with looks, being pretty and beautiful. I am those things, but I am so much more, just like many women around me.
Now I’m not saying stop all compliments that involve physical appearance – definitely don’t stop those because who the heck doesn’t want to hear that their new hair style that they spent a lot of money and time on is super cute, or that their brows are on point?!
If your friend looks bomb, tell her. Is she working that haircut? You better let her know. See a random girl in the bathroom and love her outfit? Absolutely, go ahead and inform her of her on-point style. I am all about letting other people know when they are looking good– it could make someone’s day. However, there are so many other, less common, ways to compliment people. These ways have nothing to do with the way someone looks, but they are so important.
I just think it may be good practice of being mindful to be aware of compliments we can give that are of substance and let a person know what you genuinely like/love about them.
You will be blown away by the impact these non-appearance compliments can have.
Try it on the next person you meet up with, just maybe that person will compliment the next in the same manner, and then the next, eventually creating a chain of amazing positivity that also serves as a reminder of our brilliant uniqueness!
SO WHAT COMPLIMENTS CAN I GIVE THAT DON’T MENTION APPEARANCE?
This is a question I have been pondering over for a few weeks now, I’ve thought about many of my friends and family, their amazing qualities and how I could use those qualities as a strong compliment and reminder. I have also scoured the internet for hours to create this amazing list of compliments. I know it can be awkward sometimes, and we really don’t want to sound generic when dishing out compliments so before we get to the list, here are a few tips to help you conjure up some great compliments!
THIS CAN HELP YOU CREATE SOME PRETTY NATURAL WONDERFUL COMPLIMENTS!
- Consider how they make YOU feel.
- Consider what makes them special or different.
- Consider what they commit time to.
- Consider how they are around others.
- Consider what they try or work really hard at.
Leave a comment below and let me know if you come up with some compliments that I may not have mentioned here in;
THE LIST
Here are some amazing things you can say to someone else and make their day just a little bit better. And not a single one of them involves how they look:
- You always know what to say to make me feel better
- I can always count on you to know the right thing
- You’re such an incredible storyteller, I love listening to you
- You always manage to make people laugh, it’s such a gift
- I’m in awe of what a talented person you are. You’ve got mad skills!
- Your commitment to the community is so valued, we’re so lucky to have you here
- You are so compassionate. It brings so much peace to those around you
- Your sense of humour is so contagious; You always have everyone in stitches!
- Your creativity is so inspiring. You always make me want to get crafty or artsy
- You always give 110% at work, it really boosts the morale and it doesn’t go unnoticed.
- You really know how to make people feel comfortable.
- I always know it’s going to be a good time when I’m with you.
- You are so trustworthy.
- You’re a natural leader and people really respect you for that.
- You always know the right thing to say.
- I respect how hard you work, it really motivates me.
- You are so funny.
- You are so kind.
- You are so generous.
- Your passion for “X” is infectious.
- You teach me things in a way that always make sense.
- Your spontaneity makes me want to do more in my life.
- You are an old soul.
- You always have the best advice.
- I really admire your integrity and commitment to authenticity.
- You always are able to think so quickly on your feet.
- I’m always impressed by how quick-witted you are.
- You’re even temperament really helps keep others calm.
- Your strength through the hardest moments is incredibly encouraging.
- You are an incredible human being.
- You’re so strong and resilient. I admire how you’ve turned your wounds into wisdom and your pain into power.
- Your energy is contagious. People feel better whenever you’re around!
- You are so organized. You turn chaos into order!
- I appreciate how flexible you are. You always go with the flow.
- You are a positive influence on me and those around you.
Taking care of someone else, in whatever capacity, is a lot of work, and involves so many little things for them. Tell them that you see their effort, their attention to the needs of others, their vigilance.
You never know what someone is struggling with or going home to, the words you speak have power to turn their mood upside down. It’s even more powerful when these compliments go deeper than what’s on the surface.
According to the Mayo Clinic, giving others compliments and being nicer to others can even improve your own emotional well-being.
Kind of a win-win situation right?
Stay safe & take care,
Sammi xx
A Dating fail: ‘Princess Treatment’
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